10 Practical Steps to Effectively Pray for Others

By Alvin VanderGriend

We all want to grow in our passion and effectiveness at praying for others. Here are 10 practical steps for effective intercession.

1. Make time for intercessory prayer.

If prayer is to be a priority, then we must make time for it. Those who try haphazardly to find some time each day for prayer will time and again be frustrated. Effective intercession begins with good planning. Plan for a daily time, a quiet place, and a purposeful way to use that time. Be willing to give up other priorities in order to preserve that time. E. M. Bounds was probably right when he said: “God does not bestow his gifts on the casual or hasty comers and goers. Much time with God alone is the secret of knowing him and of influence with him.”  Plan well and make meeting God the highlight of your day. Of course, since God is with you in all of life, you can pray anytime and anywhere.

2. Seek God’s face before you seek His hand.

Start your prayer time being quiet before God. Invite Him to reveal Himself to you. Begin to listen for His voice. Discover His heart. Feel His presence. Let him express His love for you, and express your love for Him. Ask Him to help you see things from His point of view. Faith grows strong when you focus on God. Draw near to God and He will draw near to you. “Be still,” He said, “and know that I am God” (Psalm 46:10). Inner stillness, together with freedom from external distractions, paves the way to experiencing God. 

3. Make sure your heart is clean.

Unconfessed sin will block prayer (Psalm 66:18). Invite God to search you as David did when he said, “Search me, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me” (Psalm 139:23–24). That’s a prayer that God is ready to answer. He is eager to help us identify and confess sin so that He can cleanse us and free us from its burden and its guilt. Clearing the air with God, by means of confession, allows us to go forward in prayer without hindrance.

4. Ask for the Spirit’s help.

Without the Spirit’s help we cannot pray as we ought to (Romans 8:26). With His help we can be the effective intercessors God intends us to be. Jesus said, “How much more [more than earthly parents] will the Father in heaven give the Holy Spirit to those who ask him!” The Father is eager to give the Spirit because He knows how much we need the Spirit’s help, and He wants us to be effective intercessors. God’s part is to offer and to give the Spirit. Our part is to claim the gift.

5. Stop and listen to God.

True prayer is dialog not monologue, so in prayer we have to listen as well as talk. That’s true even in intercession. By listening to God speak through His Word and by His Spirit, we receive direction in what and how to pray for others. Listening might mean using the great prayers of the Bible and inserting the names of people we know into them. Listening might mean that the Holy Spirit will call to mind a promise, a warning, a command, or an example that gives direction to our prayers. It might mean that the Spirit will burden you to pray a specific prayer, for a specific person, at a specific time. When we stop and listen we are inviting God to direct our thoughts and our prayers. With His direction we can’t go wrong. He is an expert at prayer.

6. Pray with expectant faith.

The faith we bring to intercession is not confidence in prayer, it is confidence in God. It is being absolutely sure “that he exists, and that he rewards those who earnestly seek him” (Hebrews 11:6). That God “rewards” means that He hears our prayers, takes them seriously, and answers on the basis of His wisdom and His will. He does not promise to do everything we ask. He will always answer in a way that brings Him glory, advances His kingdom, and works for our good. The faith we need to be effective intercessors comes as a gift from God, so it too is something we must ask for.

7. Pray for increased love.

Love is the motivating force in all true intercessory prayer. We intercede because we love. Love always wants to give, to help, and to bless. It is even willing to sacrifice self in order to see another person receive the riches of Christ. When we pray we step with God into His loving concern for those we pray for. Ask God to grow your capacity to love as you intercede for your family, your friends, and your world. 

8. Persist in prayer.

As you persist in prayer one of three things may happen. First, the answer may come. That’s, of course, your signal to stop praying. In Jesus’ story of the friend at midnight who knocks persistently on his neighbor’s door, the neighbor eventually comes to the door and gives him bread. He has his answer and he stops knocking (Luke11:5–8). Second, God may say no. If He says no, it’s time to stop asking. Paul prayed for the removal of his thorn in the flesh. When God denied his request and promised His all-sufficient grace instead, Paul’s stopped asking (2 Corinthians 12:1–10). Third, God may lift the prayer burden. When God, who gives prayer burdens, lifts the burden, it is time to stop praying. It means that God has heard enough and He is redirecting your prayer energies. If God, however, doesn’t give you reason to stop, it probably means He wants you to persist in asking. Whatever you do, be sensitive to God’s working and timing as you persist in prayer.

9. Be ready to take action.

God wants more from us than just asking. When we intercede, we will often find ourselves identifying with those for whom we are praying and becoming eager to help them. That may be a call to action. If you feel such a call, ask God what He wants you to do for that person or in that situation, and offer yourself as a channel through whom He can work. 

10. Find one or more prayer partners.

There is a time and place to pray alone. There is also great benefit in praying with others. Prayer partners can give us support and encouragement in intercessory prayer. Your partner may be your spouse, another family member, a fellow church member, or a neighbor. You can keep in touch by e-mail, pray together by phone, or find a convenient time and place to meet. Learn to listen when your prayer partners pray and pray with them. Find a pattern of praying together that is comfortable for everyone involved.

Intercession is important work. God intends our work of intercession to facilitate His work of building the kingdom. Intercession works when we are willing to work at it.

Taken from Praying God’s Heart (PrayerShop Publishing) by Alvin VanderGrend. This book is available in both print and the e-book formats.